Saturday, November 10, 2012

Driving Tired

When I almost drove off the road while trying to decide whether a fart was wet or dry, it occurred to me that my mental capacity might be suffering.

Light at the end of the tunnel
(Actually a cloudy night and light pollution from an oil rig)
This was interesting to me, as my self-perceived level of fatigue was rather low, and I was not suffering any hints of drowsiness. I continued to think about this, but almost drove off the road again, so I saved this self inflection for a later time.

It was nearing the end of a 15 hour marathon drive. With darkness encroaching, and a deadline looming, I decided napping was not an option. So I made the pre-emptive switch to Plan B - caffeine. In this case, drinking the equivalent of 8 cups of coffee worth of sugar-free energy drinks over the final leg of the journey. I was primed.

As a side story, Plan B was developed early in life. Countless nights had been spent playing CS:S ladder games at 3am, and fatigue was not an acceptable excuse when you failed to disarm the bomb, losing precious rank in teh s3rvr.

Back to inflection; I suspect that while caffeine can improve alertness, it can't save your slow firing neurons. While I was able to react to wildlife (Reflex, like sick headshots at 3am), I doubt whether or not I would be able to accurately assess a situation should things get complicated. If I did slide off the road, I'd probably be all delirious and wander off into the forest.

Moral of this story - you should consider adopting a homeless pet before buying from a breeder. 

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Have more animations. They're prime for hits.

Everyone in my field is fat. Fact of sitting on your butt for 12 hours. You end up snacking all day out of boredom, which leads to packing on the pounds. I fell for that right off the bat, but now I'm wiser. With an adjusted diet and a little discipline, it's actually pretty damn easy to lose or at least maintain your current bodyweight.

Pro Tips for being sedentary;

  1. Be cheap. Junk food has a poor cost-to-sustenance ratio. Bang for buck is my motivator.
  2. Drink coffee. Reduces hunger and makes you happy. Just don't add cream and sugar. Drink it black.
  3. Eat dead animal. Forget fancy sauces and breading. Protein makes you a man, carbs make you soft.
  4. Hate yourself. The Dark Side of the force is more powerful - self-loathing should keep you thin.
  5. Move. Even if it's just to go look longingly in your empty fridge.
  6. Broccoli. Eat lots. Raw. It makes you poop.

Trust me here. My most popular blog post of all time is basically a picture of me shirtless. Diet blogs and stuff link to it. I'll use that empirical evidence as a positive reference. 

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Camp life

I'm living in "Camp".

It's basically just rows of portable accommodations where people who work in the petroleum industry eat, sleep and recreate. 

The corridors of rooms have paper thin walls and hollow floors.

So I get off my shift about an hour before another crew. I eat, shower, and get all snuggled in for a nice sleep when these guys come thundering in. It's like a freaking stompocalypse in my dreams.

They're all;

And I'm all;
I'm gonna choke a bitch

Thursday, September 20, 2012

I look like a reserve dog

My face when I'm told I look like a reserve dog.

"You're nothing but balls and a ribcage."

Thursday, September 6, 2012

I love crashing.

Nothing is better.
Have some pre-amble, too.
For added value.

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Something else I want to blow my money on

My first car was a 1991 Honda Accord. I loved that car with all my heart. No pesky electronics to get in the way of my teenage recklessness, and the E-Brake was placed (almost too) perfectly for superb leverage and accessibility. As it's clock rolled over to 340,000km, it's lack of reliability became a concern. And so I invested in my second and current car, a 2001 Ford Focus Station Wagon.

The Focus is the pinnacle of reliability and practicality. Good fuel mileage and huge cargo capacity made it the ultimate skier car. That beautiful steed spent it's days shuttling myself and other athletes all over Alberta and BC. It was even able to moonlight as an RV. But since retirement, I no longer have needs, only wants. And I want a toy. So that brings me to the next thing I want to blow my money on.

A Subaru WRX STI.

It's been decided - I want one. However, a difficult decision lies ahead. Do I want a Second, or Third Generation car?

Second Generation

The Second Generation styling inspires a greater boner. It was offered exclusively in a sedan, gaudy oversized spoiler included, which really let's the world know I'm no soccer mom. And that's important in a car, right?

Third Generation
The Third Generation looks quite a bit more pedestrian. You're lucky if it inspires a half-chub. Then you jump inside and notice the technology. Ohhhhh baby, the technology! The Drive Controlled Center Differential gets me all hot and bothered. Seriously.

Ha, who am I kidding.
I'm getting the Third Gen.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Stuff I want to blow my money on

So, since I don't really train and compete any more, I don't have much new to blog about.

I work a job.

Well, that's what's new for the last month.

Now, something crazy has happened since I started working - I have money. I've started spending money on things I would have abstained from before, and yet there's still more money than before. Seriously. If you've never had full-time, gainful employment before; I will tell you that this shit is thoroughly good.

So here goes a new topic - stuff I want to blow my money on. Today's thing - a new leather race suit.

I push my own limits pretty hard when racing motorcycles, and as a result, I've been down more times than a Tijuana hooker. So my leather suit is getting shagged. Holes in the shoulders, tearing seams, and flaps of leather just hanging out. It was also a bargain purchase - under $300 for a brand new suit. It's my size, but the proportions are off. Loose around the gut, but painfully tight on the thighs and forearms. It's a little restrictive around the shoulders, too, which makes looking "through" corners pretty tough. So, a custom suit it is.

Custom tailored leather suits can get pretty pricey, but I think Spartan Leathers is the ideal choice. Quite cheap in the custom world, but highly regarded and positively reviewed.

Right now, I'll gladly toss $1000 away in exchange for fit and mobility. Plus, you get to choose the colours. You also get titanium plates that probably spark super cool when you crash.

Definitely can't wait to blow my money on this.

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Electronic Stability Control

Almost all modern vehicle have some form Electronic Stability/Traction Control systems. They're meant to help keep the driver in control, and maintain overall vehicle stability.

I haven't got a real problem with these systems. I believe they can be dangerous if people grow to rely on these systems, believing their vehicle's computers will save them if they get into trouble. But for the most part,  they do their jobs.

What's starting to irritate me is the lack of freedom with these systems. The industry seems to be making these systems compulsory. You can't disable it!

I'm currently driving around an hour everyday on rough lease roads. The condition isn't really THAT bad, and I would personally have no immediate issue driving my Ford Focus on these roads. But the vehicle I'm driving, a 2012 Dodge RAM 3500, seems to disagree. The built-in electronic stability control is constantly imposing. For some reason a 0.5 second wheel slip requires a full on intervention. The truck immediately loses power, falls flat on it's face! Once the system has decided the conditions are acceptable, control is returned to the driver and we continue along.

In all honestly, there is no reason for it's intrusion. I drive responsibly, well within my personal skill and my vehicle's capabilities. I wish I could disable the system completely. As it is, it'll just burn itself out. Or cause excessive brake pad wear.

Anyways, pointless rant over. Have a picture of the sun setting behind my rig.

Sunday, July 8, 2012

Ever wondered what drilling for oil looks like?

Satellite TV, Internet and Air Condition
More amenities than my own home
My official title is "MWD Hand" or something. Stands for Measurement While Drilling. Basically, I keep track of a handful of directional parameters, coupled with the length of your drill string, you can pretty easily figure exactly where your drill tip is, even if it's 10 kilometers underground.

Anyways, there's some super ghetto software that looks after everything. I'm just here in case things go south. So until then, I'm chillin' like a villain.

Saturday, June 23, 2012

I'm a lazy blogger

But I'm good at motorcycles.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

One from the archives (I don't know why I didn't post this?)

Holy crap, Blogger is way different than the last time I posted. Interface is clean, but freaking me out!

Anyways, Motorcycle race season is quickly approaching, so I'll probably be posting about that a lot. Latest acquisition is a 4000watt Champion Generator.

This baby is a dream! Purchased brand new from Canadian Tire. Only $279.99 (Regular $599). Seriously awesome.

I've been shopping long and hard for a good used deal, but even the exact same generator was selling for over $200. So I figured the extra cash was worth it, as it comes with a 2 year warranty. Then I know it's history and how well it has been taken care of.

Fired it up already, and it runs my Suzuka Tire warmers without trouble. That might only be a 1000watt draw though - should be plenty of overhead if a friend wants in. It's also getting a special brand of love - oil from the race bike. Motul 7100 in your generator is funny, trust me.

At 68dBa, it's a little loud. Most of it is valve/piston noise, so sadly a DIY custom exhaust will do me no good. I really sincerely wanted a Honda Generator - the Honda EU3000iC is truly boner inspiring (If you're into Generators). They are rated at 57dBa, so given that decibels is a logarithmic scale, the Honda genny would be less than half as loud. It's also about 30lbs lighter than my 110lbs Champion, and it would even use a little bit less fuel. But brand new, they retail at $2,800! Used, they don't sell for less than $1000. Dang.

Maybe Honda will sponsor me someday - but probably not, I race on a Suzuki. :3

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Sexy New Banner

Long "This is what I did this month cause I can be arse'd to make frequent updates" posts are retarded. So you get to read about last month, but this month.

This evening, I will discuss my first track day of the season.

Testing footpeg positioning
It's seriously awesome to get out on the new bike. I couldn't believe the amount of power it has. A 2005 GSXR600 vs. a 1992 CBR900RR. Even though they have similar peak horsepower, the GSXR hauls way more ass. I suspect it is due to more appropriate gearing, and the 150pounds less that it weighs. Either way, it was an excellent opportunity to learn about the bike and figure things out.

That said, the new bike is also super edgy. I guess I mean responsive. You can't get away with anything on it. Really bring to light ALL of my shortcomings. Throttle control needs to be perfect, or you will be all over the place. I ended the day surprisingly sore for an athlete, entirely because I had to fight against the bike so much. I was definitely getting better near the end of the day, but still have a ton of work to do.
Beautiful new white boots got marred in the incident

Also, I broke my metatarsus. With such a powerful bike, I was having a hoot sliding the rear under power. It got a little away from me and bucked me out of the seat, and my foot ended up under the rear wheel. Sucked, but I kept the bike up.

I'm also sharing a brief video of basically what happened to me, except I didn't go off the course.

Sunday, April 29, 2012


Got some glorious new tires for the race bike this weekend - Pirelli Diablo Supercorsa's.

Stoked out of my mind to install them, I go to take off the front rim of my bike, and BOOM. I need a huge 24mm hex tool to remove it. Largest in my collection is 19mm. Here's how the rest of the day went;

$4 for a rod coupler. I win at mechanics.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Harassing Wildlife

We get bored in the mountains

Friday, April 13, 2012


Recently acquired a '92 Ford Ranger to be used as a bike hauler for the summer. Working on old crap is frustrating, because everything is either broken, ghetto, or corroded into some unrecognisable form. 

It's getting bad when you need a tool to use your tool.

Got these vicegrips on so damn tight I had to use pliers to release them. It was a semi-success. The vicegrips didn't slip, which is good. But the bolt I was holding was rusted so bad it just broke anyways. Typical.

Good times grinding broken bolts, too. Sparks are cool.

Now that the bolt fit nicely into the vice, I used the impact to bust the nut off. (Giggity) It's faint in the picture, but the friction from a tight nut made the bolt hot enough to smoke the PB Blaster off. 

I'm probably going to post about this truck a lot. It's a piece of crap, but I love it so much.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Since my last post...

I went to Quebec and built a lewd snowman.

That about sums up my winter.

What have you done with your life?

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Race Schedule is up

So it's been a bitter cold week in Canmore. I've chosen to stay inside as much as humanly possible, as -30°C gets old, really fast. Good week for it, though. Wrapped up an epic volume block, training almost 25 hours per week is tough. I might have even overdone it a bit - found myself getting irritable. 

I way more exciting news, the race schedule has been released for my summer of glorious motorcycle racing. I'm stoked out of my mind.

Monday, January 16, 2012

More boot pictures

A nice new pair of TCX S-Race racing boots.

My old boots offered little or no ankle protection, but these bad boys have it all. Should keep me safe if anything bad happens. But my strategy is just "not crashing." So since I won't be crashing, I could probably race in shorts and a t-shirt.

TCX S-Race Boots

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

January Rain

Slush in my yard.
Picture added just for the sake of media.
Ha, what a winter already.

Last year (2010/11) a weather agency released a forecast calling for a long and cold winter. And it was! Many -20 weeks, and a couple -30 days thrown in for good measure.

So this year (2011/12) the same weather agency made another forecast - even colder and longer than last year.

Well, so far, they've been extremely wrong. It's currently +4 and raining. The seasonal average calls for a maximum of -4, lows of -14. So yea, way warmer than average. Snow at the nordic center is starting to suffer. Chinook winds are blowing debris all over the place. Really feels like late April skiing, not early season.


Tuesday, January 3, 2012

SPOT GPS Tracker

Before my trip to Chicago this past summer, I bought a SPOT Satellite Messenger. It's a neat little GPS unit that you can use to track your location, even outside of cell service. It was mainly to give my parents peace of mind as I was travelling alone.

There was also one instance, while passing through Minneapolis, where a friend was able to tell me where a storm cell was in relation to my location. He told me it was moving at 70mph, so if I moved my ass, I could outrun it! And I did!

Aaaaanyways. It stopped working. Didn't get dropped, submerged in water, exposed to extreme temperatures... Nothing. Just turned it on one day and nothing. I braced myself against what I expected to be a big warranty hassle...

To my surprise, I went to the website,, clicked Warranty, entered my info, and it was submitted! And then less than a week later, a box showed up at my front door with the replacement unit! Awesome service from Globalstar.

Monday, January 2, 2012

Long day

Had a long ski today. Some basic stats so we can all high-five later;

Distance: 45.9km
Vertical climbing: 2.3km

Max speed: 46.5km/h

3.5 hours of slow skiing
Today was pretty slow ski day. Warm temperature and a lack of structure on my training skis caused a lot of drag. As a bonus for using training skis; I could ski wherever I wanted without fear of damaging a nice pair of skis!